For My Daughters

Hello there, darlings.

The three of you are 10, 7 and 5 now. Mommy's sitting down somewhere on my own, writing this down for you girls to read in, maybe, 15 years? Not that I expect to be dead in 15 years but well, you never know. Life is full of surprises.

Where do I begin? Hmm.

If you were to ask me one day, what was the event that made me the happiest person alive? I would tell you that there isn't just one, but four events that occurred at different times which made me the happiest person in the world at that time, at that moment. It was the birth of the three of you and your brother.

Z was delivered in the evening after 8 hours of pain. I was accompanied by your Grandma and we conveniently got high together on Entonox. She saw it all. S was delivered after 6 hours of extremely painful labour (I was induced), just after Christmas. K was operated out of my tummy because she had a cord around her neck. Y was delivered after an hour of pain, the labour was relatively easy but I had a hard time pushing him out.

I now speak to all of you, my strong junior feminists.

Dear Z, S & K,

I chose each of your names not because it sounded nice or so that it rhymes like one of my poems. No. Your names were carefully picked and combined based on what I feel and hope for you. We will all leave this world but our names will stay behind. 

Z - Your name was thoughtfully combined to mean wise princess, just like how Mommy's last name was combined by your grandparents. You have grown into a young lady who is very wise despite your young age and I must say that I'm very proud of you. 

S - I chose your name based on two of Prophet Muhammad's wives whose characters I love (from what I've read about them). They were both strong-willed women with a mind of their own, and I must say that you have begun to live up to your name.

K - I didn't know what I wanted to name you until after you were born, although I had an idea what your first name would be. Your name was chosen to honour your late Dadi and the first wife of Prophet Muhammad, both of whom I revere and consider as my role-model. You have other names chosen by your Grandma and myself -  one of which is my favourite flower and the other brings the meaning Intelligent, and that you are. 

I hope that the three of you will learn to live with and love each other as much as I do my sisters and they do me. Trust me when I say that you are very lucky to have each other for when you fall, and you will fall in life sometimes, you will always have a shoulder, an ear and a hand to help you rise back up. 

Life can be intimidating, but it can also bring much happiness. I would very much like to 'mother' you girls and tell you to be careful and cautious of people bla bla bla but I shan't do that because I believe that I will raise all of you up to become capable women of intellect, wit and bravery. All of which will help you pursue whatever it is that you want in life with much passion and care. 

There will, of course, be people out there that will want to hurt you but as to that, I hope in my heart and in my prayers for all of you, that you'll be protected from such people. Be mindful, darlings, in whatever you do and say, but never suppress your wild self to accommodate others. If people can't accept you for who you are then it's not your responsibility to make them accept you.

You'll grow into a world where judgement will be thrown around without careful thought. Take it with a pinch of salt. Learn to reflect upon what others say to you, some times it can be purely nefarious and spiteful, but there will be times when what is said will hit you right in the heart and those are the things that you'll need to ponder on and decide whether what is said is constructive or not.

Always, always maintain your individuality and independence no matter where you are in life. No one else can be you and you shouldn't ever strive to be like anyone else. It's good to have strong role-models as an example, but always remember that you are yours and never anyone else's. 

Never give up on your independence. It's crucial that you continue being self-beneficient and self-sufficient throughout your life. When I say independence, I'm not talking about your financial standing, no, wealth is a fictitious source of happiness and yours should not depend on it. What I'm referring to is your state of mind and self-preservation skills. Know when to say 'no' and 'enough', and don't be shy to use these words when you feel uncomfortable with a person or a situation.

I love the three of you very, very much. I hope that you'll get to read this someday and I hope that I'll still be around then to see your faces after reading this. 

The Lioness, 

Your Mommy